FRENCH KISS!
Why did I agree to meet “French Kiss” one cold winter’s morning?
After all, when I first started online dating via Match.com, I learned very quickly to avoid replying to the “friend requests” from cute young gals about half my age, usually accompanied by selfie photos showing some cleavage. Sometimes there would be variations of these from more mature women in sexy poses.
As one widower joked when sharing one of these stories with his fellow widowers, “What could possibly go wrong?”
Well, as we all know, when we step back and think about it, just about everything can go wrong. For all we know, there is some hairy over-weight 50-year-old guy sitting in his shorts in Russia sending you these messages using photos of cute young gals captured from the web. They hope to reel you into their web of deceit and lies, ultimately planning to part you from your money and self-respect.
Let’s face it, during the first six to twelve months we, as widowers, are often slightly unhinged and extremely vulnerable to all kinds of scams. And in our desperate state of wanting female companionship our normal “filters” may not be protecting us as they usually do.
SO, KNOWING THIS, WHY DID I AGREE TO MEET “FRENCH KISS” ON A COLD WINTER MORNING 8 MONTHS AFTER MY WIFE’S PASSING? Well as Paul Harvey used to say, “Here is the rest of the story.”
While I had been approached by numerous younger women on my Match page, I had learned to either ignore or report them. But one woman “friended” me with a very different approach, which I presumed was as untrustworthy as the others. She had no photos, just a silhouette (which is often used before you decide what photo to upload). She had a minimal (2 – 3 lines at best) biography and description. She answered none of the usual questions; but her online Match name was “French Kiss.” So, of course, being a guy, I was just a little intrigued.
She said she liked my Match page and wanted to meet me. I asked her for a photo and a little more info before we met, but she demurred. I asked her how I would know her when we met for coffee. And again, she sidestepped telling me anything more.
I told her that my fear was that I would enter the coffee shop and end up asking several single women whether they were “French Kiss.” Which meant I might end up getting slapped or worse. She got a kick out of that story, probably figuring that it would be pretty funny to watch me from outside the coffee shop.
Well against my better judgement I set a time to meet with her at Starry Night, a downtown coffee shop. Sure enough, I showed up a few minutes early and had to ask a single gal if she was “French Kiss.” Fortunately, she had a sense of humor and did not slap me (though the guy who was the barista was giving me a suspicious look).
Then, I turned around and an absolutely gorgeous gal walked into the coffee shop. She was just a few years younger and was clearly enjoying the moment. Once I confirmed that she was in fact, “French Kiss,” we were able to sit down and chat. Two hours later we took a walk around downtown, and parted ways amicably. Though we spoke a few more times, we found that our interests were just too different, and nothing more came of it.
The lesson I learned from this experience is that while we need to keep our guard up and to enter every situation with our eyes wide open, every once in a while, a great opportunity may come your way from unexpected places. So, don’t ignore the flashing red lights (young gal showing cleavage); but you might want to proceed with caution if there is a yellow warning light.
© Copyright 2025 Fred Colby
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Fred Colby is the author of:
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